Truthfully
on the eve of 2022 , I can hardly remember the end of 2020 as we rang in
2021. This year, I picked back up life and happiness and left the anxiety and depression that
the pandemic closure caused behind. The year is pretty much a complete blur but in the past few months I have learned some important lessons that are swinging me into 2022.
One thing that picked up n 2021 is listening to podcasts in the car while I drive. In a random happenstance, I listened to Mel Robbins talk about the power of a high five. Interesting enough, high fives are literally my favorite thing in life. I love high fives. I love the celebration, I love the science of the endorphins that are released in receiving a high five. Did you know that there is a national high five day? True story. I have the t-shirt. Like, I love high fives. This person also taught me of the power of a high five ... wait for it ... to yourself. And, I love it. So I sort of connected with this person's ideas right away. She then later taught me that not all my dreams are meant
to be fulfilled. I wrestled with this idea for a long time because I believe that God plants dreams in my heart in order t see them through. If anyone knows me, you know I am a dreamer.
I do not believe to that dreaming is a waste of time. I am most definitely a dreamer of dreams. I dream big with hopes of knowing these dreams as a reality. I am the product of broken dreams and dreams reimagined. Old dreams, new dreams and everything in-between. To hear that not all my dreams are meant to be fulfilled completely left me on a shaky foundation. Do all my dreams have purpose? Absolutely. But I came to realize that doesn't
mean they will all be achieved. Learning this was a game changer for me at
the end of 2021. Truth is, I struggle with my broken dreams and disappointment in life more than I would like to admit. I continue to ask why instead of looking at what my past has done for me and not to me. So instead I am standing firm in the fact that I owe it to myself to become everything I have ever dreamed of being because the things I am passionate about are not random, they are my calling. I am a happy, passionate, and confident person at my core. I believe that. So it is time to give myself a break and start growing in new ways again. It it time to get reconnected with myself.
I'm now spending time reimagining my dreams and hope for the
future. My path into 2022 is much clearer than what I leave behind. After deciding that I wasn't ready to return to school in 2021, I found a better fit and will begin my doctorate at SNU in February 2022. I have stopped ignoring that storage pile in my so-called office space, cleaned out the clutter and painted my room the most beautiful color of blue. I have felt like my body would really like for me to get rid of gluten, so I did. Next up: Lasik eye consultation - fingers crossed that I qualify. New year,
same me. I keep saying that I'm going to love her better, but this time, I'm
pretty sure that I mean it.
I'm created for a purpose. ❤
