I look back on my 30's and realize that we began our family right before I turned 31. This, I am sure, is most of the reason that my 30's flew past in a bit of a blur. However, I know this for sure; It is, without a doubt, the greatest honor of my life to be a mother to these two children.
In my 30's I lost both my grandmother and my mom. I also had the great honor and privilege to speak at both of their funerals. If you know me well, then you know that I am a very emotional person. How I pulled myself together enough to honor these women in the way that they shaped me, is truly only by the grace of God. I look back on these two defining moments and am proud that I had the honor of sharing their life and memories with others. Losing my mother was something I was never ready for and on some days I wonder if I have yet learned how to truly grieve. I am aware that it looks different for everyone. I have decided that it is not a process to complete. You won't necessarily get through it or over it. Grieving my mom is a new element of me that I do in my own way. I have a new way of seeing. I have added new dimensions to myself since watching her leave this earth. I do wish I had her going into my 40's and then wonder if that is selfish. She was always so selfless and deserves the beauty and crown that she now wears in heaven. Sill, there is a lot happening here that I know she'd be proud of.
In my 30's I taught 4 different grade levels in two different school districts. I squeezed a great year of launching my own transitional kindergarten somewhere in between there. I started and finished my Master's at UNT and left the classroom to be an instructional coach. Needless to say, there has been a lot of learning, changing and growing along that road. My career makes me proud and I hope to continue that growth into my 40's. There is a big part of me that wants to continue my education further. I am incredibly blessed to have had the support of my family in each new phase.
We sold two homes and lived in two different cities in my 30's. On the brink of 40, we are currently looking for a new home. That has been a learning process all of it's own.
We have bought 2 new cars and way too many Lego's. We have vacationed to the beach a few times, to the mountains and to Disney World. We have had a few adventures that hold precious memories that will last for years. In my 30's I had my first colonoscopy where they removed a pre-cancerous polyp. My new PSA is to go get a colonoscopy. We consume so much junk and fake processed food. Take care of yourself. Get regular checkups! The past few months of my 30's I have been treated for an autoimmune condition and take a hormone replacement each morning. I am not even sure I fully understand what is happening ... but oh the hot flashes! That is no joke y'all. Now, that does make me feel a bit old, but the doctors are in the beginning stages of trying to figure out some odd allergic reactions/ flares that I keep having. We'll just have to figure this one out in my 40's! I have discovered threading my eyebrows vs. waxing and I highly recommend the thread! I definitely have gray hairs and you know what? I think I like them. I have no plan to color my gray hairs anytime soon. I don't want to keep up with that business. Plus, these gray hairs make me smile a bit at the life I'm creating.
Truth is, if you knew me over the last decade you'd say that I have changed a lot. Truth is, there was a lot that changed me. I am entering my 40's believing that everything continues to happen for a reason. I do not fear the future for I know who is the author of my story is. I am privileged to to enter my 40's and I pray that I get the chance to grow old. I know that not everyone is given that chance, so I will appreciate it and be thankful for it every single day of my life.
Here's to my next chapter.
Here's to being 40.
